5.11.2011

Today's a little different, but I think Modern Family would have been a show that Casey would have loved. Here are some of my favorite quotes! - E


‎You look like you stood under a bird that poops ugly hats."

‎"I have some concerns about the shower situation…I'm pretty much at my target weight, but the thing is, I haven't quite reached my target height."

‎"We need to talk about this Ta-da."

"Luke. I am your father. That's what I said when you were coming out of your mom's lady parts."

‎"You danced without me Mitchell!"

‎"You're worried about germs? I've seen you kiss a pigeon on the mouth."

‎"Tell me it was booze, cheating, physical abuse, no problem. I’m a monogamous social drinker and Claire only sleep-hits me."

‎"Leave it to the gays to raise the only underachieving Asian in America."

"It's like they say, sometimes God closes a door, but sometimes he closes it so hard, you can't get your wife out."

‎"Angela Lansbury was the grand marshal. Good times she wrote."

‎"I had bread, I had cheese, and I had an iron. What was I supposed to do?"

"Just to be clear, I'm not condoning eating your kids, but I sure as heck know why giraffes do it."

‎"Every realtor is just a ninja in a blazer. The average burglar breaks in and leaves clues everywhere, but not me. I’m completely clueless."

“That’s what the disabled lesbian shaman who blessed Lily’s room said, too.”

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